Buddies?

Buddies?
By: Mia Black
3/31/08

Where have all the adults gone? I ask this question after speaking with my husband about the teachers of today. It may sound a bit old fashion, but I remember my teacher wearing a skirt or loose fitting “slacks”, short-cut hair or pulled back or up, some make-up, and at least twenty to thirty year difference in age. Never did my teacher dress like me or talk like me. And never could I read about one of my classmates sleeping with one of them.

Now I will say me and my husband stand on different ends of the spectrum when it comes to the problems with todays at-risk youth. He and I both look at the parent, but I put most of the responsibility on the child. I believe every child must be held accountable for their actions. But it was amazing to me today that we both finally agreed on something. Today’s teachers have become younger, hipper, and entered the “buddy” zone.

This is not the first time that I have heard this either. On radio stations and talk shows, parents and teachers have talked that it is harder to reach today’s youth. So in trying to reach them “you have to speak their language” or “you almost have to dress like them with the throwbacks and the hoodies”. I’m sorry, but at what low point did we hit in society, that our kids now need their teachers to be their friends too? It is my belief that many of these at risk youths already have suffered from their parent/s being their friend/s and now they are being subjected to yet another “adult” trying to play buddy. I mean honestly, we are living in a society in which it is not odd to read about yet another teacher sleeping with their student or a student’s life is over because they killed their teacher’s spouse in a jealous rage.

I’m not saying it is easy to teach our at-risk youth by any means. But my husband visited a classroom today and asked a student to remove his hat. The student refused and continued to talk to his friend. My husband didn’t yell, scream, or cause a scene, but explained to the student, that if he wanted to be viewed as a man, than he would have to remove his hat. He explained that men remove their hats before they enter a building and pointed to his hat that was in the corner with his coat. The student told him, nobody had ever put it that way before and removed his hat. My husband didn’t try and speak his language, or keep his hat on just to fit in. He set an example and allowed the student to follow.

My point is children need adult role models. It may seem easier to throw on the hoodie or the lycra pants. It may seem easier to call them dawg or slip into their slang, but how is that going to get them the interview for the job that will someday support their family? How will they know to take their hat off before they enter a building, if their teacher has chosen the peer route, instead of the adult route? I do agree that children want a peer when it comes to their teacher or parent for that matter, but it is not what they need.